Moranda is a 24 year old full time student. She has Cerebral Palsy, chronic depression, and mild chronic pain. She was diagnosed with CP shortly after birth and with depression at 16 years old. Moranda is one of the sweetest, funniest and most gental people on Twitter. We laugh and chat about any and every topic imaginable almost daily. I also happen to know that Moranda is outgoing, fun and supportie offline; often looking for someone to go out with for just a quick bite to eat or a full hang-out session. So when I thought about the perfect single person to profile, Moranda was my first pick.
What do you want in a partner?
My ideal partner would be someone who is kind, funny, intellectual (not in a classist way, but you know, lol) and more outgoing than me because I’m really shy.
Would you prefer a disabled or abled partner? Why?
[I would date a]nyone, (my sexual orientation is open ended, but I guess I consider myself bisexual?) who is able to recognize that I, as a black, disabled woman, face a lot of complex discrimination. If you can listen to disabled folks and educate yourself continually, I think I want the same things in a relationship as anyone else.
How has your illness affected your dating life?
I am not actively looking for a Partner right now. I have a couple dating apps on my phone, but I don’t go on them very often. I think that being disabled has definitely made dating hard. I feel like most people see my chair and get anxious about whether or not I’m physically and emotionally capable of dating.
What do you want in a partner?
My ideal partner would be someone who is kind, funny, intellectual (not in a classist way, but you know, lol) and more outgoing than me because I’m really shy.
Would you prefer a disabled or abled partner? Why?
[I would date a]nyone, (my sexual orientation is open ended, but I guess I consider myself bisexual?) who is able to recognize that I, as a black, disabled woman, face a lot of complex discrimination. If you can listen to disabled folks and educate yourself continually, I think I want the same things in a relationship as anyone else.
How has your illness affected your dating life?
I am not actively looking for a Partner right now. I have a couple dating apps on my phone, but I don’t go on them very often. I think that being disabled has definitely made dating hard. I feel like most people see my chair and get anxious about whether or not I’m physically and emotionally capable of dating.
Do you think you’d make a good partner? What do you bring to a relationship?
I think I would make a good partner because I’ve helped all of my friends with their relationship drama all through our teens and early 20’s. It’s like I have the practical knowledge but no first-hand experience, romantically, anyway. There are obviously things that matter in any sort of relationship. I’m really big on open communication and being assertive about I need, and I want the same for everyone else. From what I’ve heard, communication is an issue in lots of relationships. Another thing is honestly. It seems super basic, but I don’t lie to people I care about.
Do you think you hold back from finding a partner because of insecurities?
I have a habit of pulling away from people if I feel like they’re “too good” for me. If I start talking to someone and we really click, I get nervous and pull away and avoid them until they lose interest.
Do you think you’re seen as a sexual person?
I would consider myself a sexual person for sure lol. I don’t talk about it much because 1. I’m a virgin so there’s not much to talk about and 2. I think disabled folks are infantilized in society, which makes hard for my sexual desires to be appreciated. If I’m flirting with someone at the club and he walks me back to my place, we’re not going to make out on my doorstep, even if we want to, because something in the back of their mind is telling them this isn’t what I really want, how can it be? I’m disabled, I’m not supposed to be sexy.
Do you think about parenting with disability?
I don’t want to have children, not because I’m disabled, I just don’t really like kids lol.
Do you ever feel like you dismiss it for yourself because you are disabled?
If anything, people feel sorry for me that I am not in a relationship or that I don’t want kids because they think that marriage and kids would somehow fill some perceived void in me. That I would be able to be “normal”—because if I am able to care for a family, that must mean I can care for myself too, so it’s like my disability cancels out lol
What are some benefits of being single while disabled?
I think the biggest benefit of being single while disabled is that I don’t have to worry about what a partner will think of me if I only eat takeout and don’t clean my house while I’m dealing with a pain flare up lol. Or that I can’t just drive somewhere and pick them up or vice versa.
I think I would make a good partner because I’ve helped all of my friends with their relationship drama all through our teens and early 20’s. It’s like I have the practical knowledge but no first-hand experience, romantically, anyway. There are obviously things that matter in any sort of relationship. I’m really big on open communication and being assertive about I need, and I want the same for everyone else. From what I’ve heard, communication is an issue in lots of relationships. Another thing is honestly. It seems super basic, but I don’t lie to people I care about.
Do you think you hold back from finding a partner because of insecurities?
I have a habit of pulling away from people if I feel like they’re “too good” for me. If I start talking to someone and we really click, I get nervous and pull away and avoid them until they lose interest.
Do you think you’re seen as a sexual person?
I would consider myself a sexual person for sure lol. I don’t talk about it much because 1. I’m a virgin so there’s not much to talk about and 2. I think disabled folks are infantilized in society, which makes hard for my sexual desires to be appreciated. If I’m flirting with someone at the club and he walks me back to my place, we’re not going to make out on my doorstep, even if we want to, because something in the back of their mind is telling them this isn’t what I really want, how can it be? I’m disabled, I’m not supposed to be sexy.
Do you think about parenting with disability?
I don’t want to have children, not because I’m disabled, I just don’t really like kids lol.
Do you ever feel like you dismiss it for yourself because you are disabled?
If anything, people feel sorry for me that I am not in a relationship or that I don’t want kids because they think that marriage and kids would somehow fill some perceived void in me. That I would be able to be “normal”—because if I am able to care for a family, that must mean I can care for myself too, so it’s like my disability cancels out lol
What are some benefits of being single while disabled?
I think the biggest benefit of being single while disabled is that I don’t have to worry about what a partner will think of me if I only eat takeout and don’t clean my house while I’m dealing with a pain flare up lol. Or that I can’t just drive somewhere and pick them up or vice versa.
